still waiting

We're waiting.  It's still too early to know anything for this month of trying.
The waiting game requires patience, and a lot of it.  I try my best to go about normal life and not think too much about it.  But that's not always so easy to do.  When you want to be pregnant, suddenly the world becomes full of pregnancy and baby things.  Baby talk is all around.  Pregnant ladies are all around (my school has like a bizillion pregnant teachers this year...lol).  Friends and family pressuring us to have another.  And then there's that whole "act like you're pregnant, until you know you're not" thing.  Like today, I had to be careful by not ordering deli meat from Subway.

Then there's me playing see-saw.  Keeping an eye on my body and how I feel, wondering if I could be, but telling myself reasons why I should not get my hopes up.  Up and down we go.

UP:  I'm feeling tired to the point that I've fallen asleep a couple times this week for a short catnap on my sofa (something I never do). 

DOWN:  However, I've made efforts to cut down on caffeine and I'm not sleeping enough at night.

UP:  I have to pee a lot more (a sign with my first pregnancy). 

DOWN:  However, I do drink a lot of water.

UP:  I've had this slight feeling, kinda like heartburn, sometimes a little more than that. 

DOWN:  However, I had this feeling last month while I had the flu.  Maybe I'm just having heartburn or maybe I ate something that didn't agree with me too well.

UP:  I got a couple of small pimples, a sign of pregnany. 

DOWN:  However, I always get a pimple or two the week before my period.

UP:  My breasts possibly feel different (ever so slighty btw). 

DOWN:  However, I always have tenderness a couple of days before my period.

UP:  And I won't go too personal with the whole bodily fluid talk, but what I'm seeing could be a sign. 

DOWN:  However, it is normal for me to have a similar situation before menstration.

I think it's just a case of, "I want another baby, I want to be pregnant." vs.  "Don't get your hopes up.  The more you think about it and want it, the more disappointed you'll be when "your friend" comes and you find out you're not pregnant."

So, in order to help me out, I'll be taking a week or so off blogging.  I don't want to think or talk too much about pregnancy (which is incredibly hard to do these days when so many around me are pregnant, but I'm so happy for them (truly I am) that I kinda sorta don't mind all the talk, at least for now...if this game goes on for months I may feel differently, just being honest here). 

So, until the next post...

image via

inside pregnancy videos

I was taking a look over at Babycenter today.  I was actually looking up some information on the safety of certain foods during pregnancy; peanut butter, fish, and caffeine to be exact.  But I'll post more about those things later on.  If you are currently pregnant or trying to conceive, and have a specific food question, Babycenter has a lot of useful info.  Or you can of course talk to your Dr.

Anyway, I decided to check out some of their videos.  I'm wondering why I never checked them out before.  They have some wonderful videos that take a look inside pregnancy, from conception to right before birth.  The images are computerized but real.  Everything is explained in a clear and educational kind of way.  I really enjoyed watching them.

Click here for the first video called "Inside pregnancy, weeks 1 to 9".  After watching this first video you can then click on the list to the right where you'll find four more "Inside pregnancy" videos.  They also have a ton of other videos to enjoy as well.  I also watched a video about getting the epidural (which I did get with my first one).  That particular video was a bit graphic, I must warn, but it was pretty amazing at the same time.

I think I will show the "Inside pregnancy" videos to little guy when and if I become pregnant.  This decision would be based on one's parenting techniques of course, but personally I feel that these videos are educational and not too real-life graphic.  This decision would also be based on your child.  Every child is different.  Some children might be fascinated while others might be unsure about it all.  But considering little guy already knows a lot about how babies grow in the Mommy, I believe he's ready for such videos.

Anyway, happy watching and learning.  :)

patience in parenting

Patience.  One of THE most challenging things to obtain.  And when it comes to parenting, patience will be tested to the fullest.

We must be patient with our partners in family planning.  When to have children, how many children to have, what to name those children, how to raise those children, and the list goes on.  For those who are blessed with the surprise of pregnancy, they must be patience with all of the sudden responsibilites and changes that come their way.

We must be patient in trying to conceive.  For some it will happen quickly, for others it may take months, even years, and for some it may never happen the way they had planned, and they may then have to deal with patience in adoption and all that comes with it.

We must be patient throughout pregnancy.  Morning sickness, cravings, mood swings, fatigue, and so much more.

We must be patient in those first days and weeks of life with a newborn.  It is not easy, not at all.  And I sometimes believe that if you can make it through that time, you can make it through anything.

We must be patient as our children grow.  Sickness, teething, diaper rash, infections, colic, potty training, weening, temper tantrums, schooling, phases, puberty, and so much more.

And here I find myself, having a secret little battle with patience.  Wanting to conceive, and wondering if this month will be the month.  But I must wait, and then wait a little more.  There is truly nothing I can do except be patient.  So patient it shall be.  :)

P.S.  That fabulous little necklace above is from Etsy, and you can find it here.  What is so coincidental about finding this piece is that the designer designed it for those trying to conceive.  It comes with a fresh water pearl and a rose quartz, which is believed to be a bead of love and fertility.  I was searching for an image to represent patience, and found this piece.  I love when things like this happen.  :)

trying...second month

Our second attempt has begun.  I printed a new calendar and we're ready.  Although I must say that we are relaxed and just having normal fun.  ;)  Let's see how this month will turn out.  If we do not get pregnant, I'm not sure if we'll try again for awhile.  We may try a third time and if it doesn't work then we'll have to postpone for some time.  And this is because of our travel plans next summer.  But we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.
So how much do you know about the whole conception thing?  If you're like me, you probably studied this in school.  But it wasn't until I was trying for my son that I really had an interest in knowing all the details.  It is actually quite the miracle.

Some interesting facts:

~ an egg is released each month and will travel to one of the fallopian tubes where it'll remain until possible fertilization

~ about 40-150 million sperm are ejaculated each time but only a few hundred will reach the egg

~ fast sperm can reach the egg within half an hour while slower sperm can take days

~ it only takes a single sperm to fertilize an egg, and if this happens a protective layer will form around the egg to prevent any other sperm from entering it

~fertilization takes 24 hours

~ three to four days after fertilization the egg will leave the fallopian tube and enter the uterus where implantation will take place

~ let's talk chromosomes....a woman is an X, so if the sperm is an X the baby will be a girl, if the sperm is a Y then the baby will be a boy

~ Y sperm are smaller, faster and do not live as long as X sperm

~ an average pregnancy will last for about 40 weeks, drs start to calculate the pregnancy from the first day of the last period so the first two weeks of pregnancy are before conception even takes place

We just need that one little sperm, one out of 150 million.  Let's see...

images and much of the info from WebMD

the letdown

Our first month of trying has come and gone.  I'm not pregnant.  :( 
I am disappointed.  I am sad.  I feel let down.
All of which are very normal, I think.  Expected in fact.

But what surprised me where the other emotions.
I cried.
I got mad at my hubby for not wanting to try until now.  If we had started earlier maybe this month would've been the one.
I got mad at hubby's work.  He was away on business during some very crucial days.  Had he been home maybe things would be different now.
I got mad at my body for misleading me.  I had some sort of stomach flu which threw me off.
I got mad at myself for feeling so upset.

But then I got my crap together and reminded myself of many things.
I reminded myself that getting pregnant the first month of trying is far from an easy task.
I reminded myself that this is nothing compared to what couples struggling with issues like infertility go through.
I reminded myself that we have pressured ourselves into a certain time frame and that that adds stress.
I reminded myself that my body has not failed me, rather being sick with a stomach flu was a real thing.  If I wasn't trying to get pregnant I would've known that my symptoms were in fact what they were, flu symptoms.
And most importanty, I reminded myself that May is in fact another month, another chance to try.

I'm good now.  Over it. 
Seeing hubby's disappointment reminded me that I'm not alone in this.  Support is everything.
And looking at little guy reminds me that I am truly blessed.  I love him so much.

I think I will treat myself to a warm, relaxing bubble bath (I've read some articles that this is not the best idea for pregnant women, but I'll post more about that later).
I may also treat myself to a new haircut and color (there's controversy about the safety of hair color during pregnancy, especially in the first trimmester).

You know, because May is another month.  ;)

prenatal vitamins

It's a well know fact that taking prenatal vitamins before and during pregnancy is of great benefit to your baby.  And a woman in child bearing years should be sure to take folic acid.  Studies have shown that folic acid can help decrease birth defects.

Not every woman is able to plan out her pregnancies, things happen.  Even when precautions are being made, things happen.  I call these "blessings" rather than "things" but that's just me.  ;)  Anyway, if you are able to plan, try taking prenatal vitamins months before even trying to conceive.  With my first pregnancy, I took prenatal vitamins a whole year before even trying to get pregnant.  This time around I also started early.

Now, there are a TON of prenatal vitamins out there.  I was looking at one website and I saw vitamins that were in the hundreds of dollars price range.  That's just crazy people.  Let me tell you what I took before and what I'm currently taking now.

When I was pregnant with little guy I was taking GNC prenatal vitamins which you can find here.

The price (from their website) is $9.99 for 60 caplets, or $17.99 for 120 caplets.  I trust GNC so I felt comfortable taking them.  I told my Dr. that I preferred them and she was fine with that.  All prenatal vitamins tend to be large but I never had a problem taking these, and I never felt sick from them (I felt sick from other things though...lol).

This time around I decided to try something a bit more budget friendly.  I've been taking Spring Valley Prenatal vitamins that can be purchased at Walmart.  You can find them here.

This bottle has an online price of $8.00 and has 240 tablets.  I have talked to women who have been recommended these vitamins by their Drs, so I take that as a good thing.  These are large, but not as large as other brands and the shape seems easier to swallow.

I am happy with both choices.  I think if and when we get pregnant, and once this bottle is finished, I may go back to the GNC brand.  But that's only because I feel it's a very trusted brand.  If money were an issue, I would have no problem sticking with the Spring Valley brand.  The decision is up to you and your situation.  I don't think paying hundreds of dollars is necessary however...lol.

Of course, you should always consult with your Dr. about what prenatal vitamins are good for you. 

ovulation calendars

I didn't use an ovulation calendar or other tools for my first pregnancy.  I did however look up what days are generally a women's fertile days (example, how many days after her last period).  This gave me a general idea of when hubby and I needed to try.
This time around I decided to refer to an ovulation calendar.  And my main reason for that was because hubby was out of town for awhile and I wanted to see if we'd even have a chance once he returned.  And according to my calendar we had a very small chance, but a chance after all. 

All of the websites I listed in my previous post have ovulation calendars but I like the one from WebMD the best.  First, they have a calculator page, where you can enter the dates of your last three periods.  This will give them an idea of how many days your cycles tend to be and they can then estimate your fertile days for the next three months.

You can click on this link to see/use it:  Ovulation Calculator

But what I liked even better, and what I personally used, was their personalized ovulation calendar.  Again, you'll need to enter the date of your last period (they will want the 1st day of your last period), and how many days your cycle usually is.  After that they will personalize a calendar complete with little clipart telling you which days you are fertile.

For this calendar you need to register with WebMD (which for me I didn't mind as I use their website often and they provide great info on all things medical).  If you'd like to try it out, click on this link:  Personalized Ovulation Calendar

The above calendar will also provide you with an option if you prefer a certain gender.  This method is not 100% successful but it's there to try.  As for me, I have no preference for my baby's gender.  With my first pregnancy all I wanted was a healthy baby, boy OR girl.  This time around is no different.  I kinda cringe when someone tells me they don't want this or that.  Does it really matter?  Sure, a little girl would be fun.  I can just imagine how fun it'd be dressing her up, playing Barbies, and bonding with a girl (right now with hubby and little guy, I'm out numbered...lol).  But boys are a joy and we'd be equally blessed with one.  So I leave it in God's hands.

Now, let's see if this ovulation calendar helped or not...  ;)